Rest, Part 3

I am not a writer. Some of my url homeschool friends whose blogs I read amaze me. Yvonne, Liz, Kathy and Dorothy (to name a very few) never cease to convict or challenge me, to make me laugh or cry. My irl friend Becky along with a team of several others writes e-devotions for our church that are incredible! Even though I am pretty good at articulating my thoughts out loud, I just cannot write them down as well. So, I have been working on this post for several days.

Every morning as part of my quiet time I try to pray. This is much harder for me than reading my Bible or memorizing Scripture because my mind wanders. I am a morning person and my mind is on the thousand things I have to do that day. It is so hard for me to focus! It would be so much easier to talk to God (and listen to him) if he were actually here in the flesh. Hmm? Maybe not! Anyway, I have been asking God every morning this year to teach me what he wants me to learn about Rest that day. Here's what I have so far:

1) Rest, in God's economy, is not necessarily the cessation of physical activity. In fact, as a mom of 4 homeschooled children, I am just not going to have a lot of free time.
2) Rest involves priorities. Even though I have many demands on my time (laundry, housework, meals, educating 4 children, church, local homeschool support group, etc.), I still have the freedom to choose which of these things come first. And maybe sometimes it should be none of these things, but something else instead (reading a book, talking to a friend, playing with my kids, a date night with my husband).
3) Rest is very much about trust. It isn't so much a physical condition of rest as a mental condition of rest. Ah, here is the crux of the matter for me! It goes back to my statement above about having trouble focusing.

I went to Sally Clarkson's blog today to read her latest post upon the recommendation of one of my "loopy" friends. The post was entitled "Moving From Anger to Joy" and was filled with good stuff to contemplate. After I finished reading, I was exiting the page when the previous post's title caught my eye: "Decluttering--The Secret to Peace and Rest". She said something I could relate to:

I'm not a person gifted in handling details—too much mail, too many catalogues, too many emails, too many options, too many things. The more there is, the more I become responsible for, the more work there is to be done, and so, the more anxious I become. Same with activities. The more I commit to, the more I say yes, the more I have to drive, the more my house gets into a mess, and the more anxious I become, the more hurried we feel, and the more weary I become. When I am not at peace, nothing in our home is at peace.

That is so true of me, though it's probably something no one really knows about me. Everyone sees how well I handle the many things going on in my life. They don't see that it robs me of peace... more often than I'd like to admit.

We can all see how too much clutter and too many piles causes us to feel overwhelmed with life... But, I have also come to realize that my brain and heart can be the same way—cluttered with worries, responsibilities, duties, children’s future, finances, time constraints, expectations, disappointments, critical attitudes, resentment. All of these added together, can tend to create soul piles and mind clutter. If I don’t take the time to sort the piles of mind clutter, my spirit becomes a mess and my heart becomes overwhelmed and weary.

Yes! This is it! What Sally talks about above is the reason I need rest, not just my busy schedule. It's a rest of the mind and soul, rather than rest of the body. And that is because I need to learn to trust God to handle all the details of my life. Sally goes on to quote many verses on rest and peace, most of which I looked up and read at the beginning of this month. So far, this is my favorite: “In quietness and rest shall be your strength.” Isaiah 30:15

Well, that's all this non-writer has for today. It is Carys' 2nd birthday. Unbelievable to us!